Breaking Through to Conquer Your Goals

Jul 30 · by admin

What does the word “Conquer” mean to you?

For each one of us it could mean a totally different thing or represent a completely different experience.

The word “Conquer” means to overcome, to gain, or to obtain by effort.

With this in mind, I want to ask you the question; what’s stopping you from conquering your current goals?

  • this day
  • this week
  • maybe even this year

My last post talked about “Challenging” yourself a little each day.”

Did you try it?

How’d it go for you?

Did it trigger you into having any internal conversation with yourself that became resourceful?  Or did you find yourself sitting on the couch and thinking about it but not doing much about it?

I know.  I’ve found myself doing that sometimes.  Circumstances come along to distract us from our goals. I don’t know about you but that’s when I need a partner to come along side me and say!  “Hey I thought you were going to do this or that?”  What happened?”

Whether it’s weight loss, exercise or going through that pile of papers you’ve been meaning to go through but haven’t for whatever reason.

“Just Do It” like Nike says!!

Let me ask you, what was it like the first time you conquered your fear of riding a bike as a kid or learning to swim for the very first time?

(Stop a moment and go back and relive that experience.)

I hope your answer was a resounding YES!!!!!  I knew I could do this!  There is a real freedom that comes over you. I remember when I was learning to swim as a kid it felt like I could go on forever.  Remember spending hours underwater talking to your sister or brother? Doing silly stuff?  It was just so freeing.

Then I joined a swim team that was a blast!

(What does a kid in the middle of the desert do but find a pool and stay in it for as long as they can to beat the heat!  Really!)

Swimming took conquering something to a whole new level for me.  First it’s the form of the stroke, getting that down.  Then conquering the ability to get to a place where the body gets its second wind. Then you can swim effortlessly for what seems like forever.

Now the fact is that this takes some time.  It doesn’t just happen after a few laps back and forth in the pool.  YOU have to consistently push yourself through every lap and then Bam!!! BREAKTHROUGH HAPPENS and you have done it.  It’s an exhilarating feeling.  Makes me just want to jump in a pool right now!!

Think how this could work in your life.

What will it take to conquer the goals that you have?

  • Do you write your goals down?
  • Do you post them where you can see them daily?
  • What will it take to move past the fear to go to the next level?
  • What kind of commitment will it take for you?
  • And lastly “How badly do you want it?!”

That’s really the question isn’t it?  How badly do I want something in my life so that I will do whatever it takes to do it?

Now let’s go back to the when you were a kid conversation.

Do you think that some of the same feelings that came over you as a child are still working in you today?

I happen to think so.  That is one of the things that is what I call your internal conversation or your historical conversation.  I’ve mentioned that before many times.  Some of those old tapes are still running around in your brain even today.

What you “GET TO” do is just notice them and discover how you can work through those haunting memories.  Yes, I said haunting and you have to decide if this is the conversation you want to be having with yourself right now or are you willing to have a different one?

I’m going to leave you with that question and you let me know what you think about what I wrote.  If it has opened up a new area in your life that you hadn’t seen before and how it affects your ability to Conquer YOUR Goals.

Love to hear about that.

Aloha for now,

Coach Kathleen


PS What you “Get to” do is think about “get to” vs have to, need to or want to.  Now that’s a whole another post.  Be watching for it. Coming to this blog soon!


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What Do You Value Most?

Jun 21 · by admin

I was going to write a piece on values to go with my last blog post. I have to tell you, though, that I had an interesting experience this morning when it comes to priorities and values.

I’d like to share with you what I saw that made me re-consider what I wanted to share — what we value in general, even in the moment. I’m was at the gym riding the bike when I look up and on the screen I see this young girl swimming upstream in what at first glance I thought was a muddy river. But, in fact, it was somewhere in Oklahoma where there was flooding taking place. As I watched her swimming, a helicopter was hovering over her from the news station breaking the story. I noticed that she was a strong swimmer and was clear about where she wanted to go, which was the next tree top. (This was how high the water was). As she inched her way along from tree to tree I began praying; please God send someone soon. At that point she had to be exhausted. She swam to a strong tree onto which she was tightly holding. She calmly waved to the helicopter. I was amazed at her strength and what seemed to be a peace in the face of what she was enduring.

Long story short, the rescuers eventually came. It was quite a sight to behold these big old firemen when they got her in the boat and onto dry land. As she stepped out and started walking unassisted by herself to the waiting helicopter, I was thinking to myself “What is this poor girl thinking right now?” Was she in shock or just on autopilot?

Why am I sharing this? I’m sharing it because I feel this is a story against all odds–a miracle. There was no way I could see or know what was important to this girl at that very moment. I’m sure she wasn’t thinking “Gee what is most important to me right now?” No, she was just acting on her instinct to survive. Just doing whatever it would take to get to the next tree. The current was increasing and I found myself saying to her, “Just stay there. Someone has got to be coming. Hold on, don’t do anything stupid.”

It was a real life drama being played out right in front of me while I was in the gym riding a silly bike trying to burn a few calories. How crazy is that? Even so, I was in it with her. And I had to think other people like myself who were watching along with me were stopping and praying. What if I was there just for that? Then that was my mission for that moment.

What we value most usually shows up in the midst of crisis. We either go into fight or flight mode. That’s just how we are designed when there is something that threatens us. We react in the moment. This is what is really important when it comes down to the end of the day.

I know we say we value certain things or even take things for granted but when we are put into a crisis situation our priorities sometimes become crystal clear pretty quick. No time to think, just do. But it’s what we do after the fact that will truly affect the way we move forward in life.

What are your goals or priorities at this very moment? Are they based on your circumstances or are you focused enough to continue to be clear on the next step you need to take to move forward in your goals or vision for your life?

Much like that young woman in the water today, we need to be clear about what it takes to get to the next tree. Just getting to the next tree is sometimes all we can handle. But it’s enough.

What about you this week?

Are you able to focus on the next step for you? Or do you get a little distracted sometimes, like me? That’s when you could use a partner to come along side and interrupt your thinking in the moment and say to you…..

FOCUS, FOCUS, FOCUS. Until you say, “Okay, Okay I’m clear now!!”

I hope this story has inspired you to look differently today at whatever you are facing. • Be clear, • Focus • Make a plan and stick to it Follow through one step at a time until it becomes one of your stronger points of who you are and your character. Let me know how it goes this week.

Aloha for Now,

Coach Kathleen

 

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If you can see it, then maybe it’s yours to change.  Okay, I know you probably don’t like hearing that, but it’s true.  Someone always has to take the first step, so it might as well be you!

I can remember way back to the first time I ever heard someone tell me that.  Boy, it really made me mad!  Why should I be the first to change? Why can’t it be he or she who does the changing first?!  After all I’m the one that is hurt, disappointed, frustrated etc….

But here’s the deal.

It’s is what it is… (You’ll hear me say that often in my blog posts for a reason.)

If you want something different and you see it first, well then I guess it’s yours to change, right!?

What if it’s someone in the workplace and you are frustrated that they aren’t pulling their load?  Think about it.  Maybe it’s really just as easy as changing your attitude towards that person. What if you could see them in a different light?  I’ll bet you’d have a whole new perspective.

Think about what may be driving your resentment or judgments of this person and just how those limiting beliefs and attitudes short change you.  YOU, not the person you have them about.  Fact is, that they probably are completely oblivious of your feelings completely!

Ever realize how much energy it takes to pick up and carry an attitude?  Think about it; physically, it can be quite literally exhausting.

So what do you do about it?  How do you make the change and shift out of the limiting conversation that you are having about this individual right now?

Well, it could be as easy as looking at what is driving this particular conversation you are having.  “Ah”, you say, “what conversation?”  And I say, “That one, the one you are having right now about what I am talking about!” See, can you hear it yourself?

It seems silly but we are constantly having these internal conversations. Some of us even talk out loud to ourselves and think nothing of it.  Mutter, mutter, mutter, but in all that muttering is a conversation that you are having either about yourself or someone else.

Here’s a good one for this week.  Start to notice when you are having that internal conversation and what is coming up for you as you do.  What are the feelings, emotions or attitudes that accompany this internal conversation and how could you shift away from any negative reactions or attitudes to have a more resourceful response to what is happening?

When I work with someone on these issues, we actually go step by step to dissect the conversation so you can see what is really going on.  It always helps to have someone else look at things from the outside and give you some feedback on what they are hearing. Of course, you then have to be open as to whether or not you are able to see things more clearly and are willing to make the change.

I guess that brings us right back where we started when I began this post!  Lol!   Seriously though, these are just things to consider.

Ponder on this a while and let me know what you think.  Could this help you in a relationship you are having with a co-worker, a spouse, a relative or child or teen, anyone that crosses your path?

My commitment is to give you the tools to go out there in your daily encounters and have more satisfying and rewarding conversations and connections with others.

After all, isn’t that part of what life is about?

 

Aloha for now,

Coach Kathleen

 

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SO NOW WHAT?

May 11 · by admin

It’s not what I expected; it’s not what I wanted;, what I signed up for. This isn’t fair, life is throwing me a curve ball and I’m not liking it one bit!! What the Heck!?

Okay, now that you got that off your chest, now what?

My desire is to offer you solutions, suggestions and possibilities that can help you to answer some of these questions or frustrations.

But for now let’s talk about a story I heard recently.  There was once a young man desiring to get married.  He was getting older and he really wanted to marry badly.  (Belief system kicking in here.) Then he meets this beautiful young woman and they fall in love in a very short time.  They also become pregnant and decide to get married.  Never mind that they were from 2 different cultures and could not understand each other at all; not being able to speak each other’s languages.  They were in love and that was that.

Long story short, the relationship ended in less than a year. He has the baby.  He is in debt up to his eyeballs.  His business is failing.  He moved in with relatives for the time being and basically it’s a mess.  (You get the picture)

Now he has some hard choices to make here.  Not an easy road to hoe any way you look at it.  BUT it is what it is…. Now, what?!   I might say, “Man up and deal with it cause it ain’t going away and now you are faced with having another life you are responsible for.”  (I sound like Dr. Laura here.  For those of you that don’t know her.  She is a straight shooting therapist and author who doesn’t pull any punches who has a very popular radio talk show, where people call in and ask for help and advice to their problems.  I really like her.)

Reality may be hard sometimes but we all have to deal with it.  Can anyone relate here?

Does this story sound familiar?  Unfortunately, it’s being played out all over the place.  There is hope in the mist for sure.  Let’s take this man’s story, for instance.  What will he need to do?  The “What Now?” conversation…

Get some support, have a plan of action and know where and how to move forward.  In other words, he needs to ask, seek and knock for the help he needs.  I know that not everyone has the luxury, but maybe we really do and we just don’t see it because we are so caught up in the event, the mess and the overall helpless feeling of hopelessness.

But I know there are ton’s of solutions out there…

In the movie  “The Pursuit of Happiness” Will Smith portrays Chris Gardner, a man who suddenly has a run of very bad luck and has to totally rethink everything about his life.  What happens to him can happen to any one of us these days.  But what he did with what happened to him made all the difference in the world for him and his son.  What happens in this clip from the movie is at first his conversation with his son comes from his “familiar” old conversation, his paradigm. But look what happens when he sees the impact it has on his son.

It takes courage and determination to fight against the familiar,  the old belief system that creeps back into our internal conversations.

Take courage …. Really, I mean it.   Seriously!  Read about someone who faced the impossible and overcame all odds.  Rent an inspiring movie that will do the same thing for you.  Create hope where there is none at the moment.  I could think of so many examples right now.

No matter what it is that you are up against if you look for something outside yourself to be encouraged or inspired by it can and does shift our thinking, our belief systems, our situations and/or our circumstances differently.  In doing so we can move towards a place of taking action, which is much better than just sitting there waiting for something to happen to us.

I mentioned this earlier in my last blog.  Be sure to check out my previous blog post.  I really love hearing your feedback on what I’ve been writing about lately.

Is this speaking to you, hitting home, or encouraging?  These are some of the ways I use my coaching skills when working with clients.  We can all speak from our experience of life to support someone on their journey.

Hope this was helpful today.  Don’t forget to let me know what you think.

Much Aloha,

Kathleen

 

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Yes You Can!!

Apr 12 · by admin

I’ve been thinking about this a lot lately.  How often we tell ourselves things like:  “I don’t have time to do this or that.  I have too many commitments.  I’m overwhelmed with work, kids, house etc.  Everyone is pulling at me from all angles.”  Least of all, this is what you might be saying to yourself.  And what are the results for some of these stresses and over committing of one’s self?

What do you think?

Are you last on your list and resenting that fact that you are?   Are others paying the price for you not taking the time for yourself?  But you say … “How can I do that when I have all these other commitments going on in my life; how else will it get done? “

Well, I say there probably are a ton of things to look at in this and if you are open to taking a look, I bet you could find some altitude enough to make some positive shifts and possibly benefit others around you as well.  Think about it.  If you are in a good place in your life don’t you think it flows over into the way you are seen by others; say, members of your family and so on?

Let’s take a look at the “what” that may be behind some of this behavior by first telling you a little bit what’s been going on for me and maybe you can relate.

About 3 ½ years ago I started taking care of my first grandchild for 2 days a week.  Now you wouldn’t think that would be any big deal, right?  Here I am, just loving being a grandma with all that entails. And I was very willing to take care of the little guy, of course!  But soon I find out that, boy, it becomes a lot of work and soon I begin to lose my focus for my coaching practice.

Why?  Because it takes tons of time to be with new babies and then they get more active and so on and so on.  (I guess maybe I forgot that small detail as I got caught up in the whole Grandma thing!)  I was trying to stay focused on getting certain things accomplished every week and yet they weren’t being done.  This was probably because I had this crazy idea that I could still work on the days that he was here and still be as productive as I was before I started taking care of him.  That was an interesting idea/theory!  Can anyone relate to this at all?

Little did I know, that would not be the case and (being the consummate multi-tasker that I am); I was also trying to launch another business as well.  So, something had to give and that something had to be me.  I kept telling myself to just surrender to the process.  Easier said than done.  Surrender was a daily process for me and still is for a lot of things in life.

Like trying to swim against the tide, we fight against what is happening and even try to change it so we can “do all things”.  We then not only frustrate ourselves but possibly even take it out on others around us because of the desire we have to see it look a certain way and when it doesn’t then….. well, you know what I mean…

And what does this have to do with “yes you can?”

Take a look at what we decide about a situation and how we don’t see any possibilities in it and where we might go because of that.  Then begin to rewrite your story to reflect another possibility and solution.  You’d be surprised at the outcome and how your attitude will shift and change.  Suddenly, this gives you more freedom to create, not just something new and different, but something transformative.  That, in itself is a whole other conversation!!

But, for now, these are just some things to think about.

I’m curious does any of this rings true for you?  Can you identify with some of what I am talking about?

If so please leave me a comment and share with me your perspectives on this subject.

I’ll be adding more about this later.  But for now, stay tuned.

 

Much Aloha,

Coach Kathleen

 

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It’s All About Our Time

Mar 18 · by admin

Here’s another way to look at Time Management and Story

I’ve talked in previous articles about how we have a story we tell ourselves and how it’s all connected to a belief system AND how that influences everything in our lives.

I’d like to touch on the story we tell ourselves about time and time management. My desire is to create value and curiosity about how certain things effect our lives and what we can do about them i.e.; time management.

Ahh yes, it’s all about our time.  How many of you here have ever taken a Franklin Covey time management course or some other sort of course that will make your life more effective and efficient so you will be able to have more time to dedicate to the things are important to you?  Whew!   That’s a mouthful and I would venture to guess that most, if not all, of us have invested in some sort of class or system with the promise that it will make our lives more effective and efficient. Right?! I know I have over the years.

And what do we get with that?  We get the promise that if you do this system ( and don’t get me wrong, systems are great) then you will have it all dialed in and life will become easier and then you can spend more time doing the things that you love and care about, right?

WRONG!!

I mean really, think about it, a whole industry has sprung up around how to manage your time. What is usually the promise that comes with implementing such a system?  Well, just as the promise states; you’ll better manage your time. You will become more efficient and not miss appointments, etc., and be able to manage your day more productively.

That is the promise right?

Here’s the real Promise – life is short, time is of the essence; we only have so much of it, we’ve only so long on this earth and we gotta make it count! I need to create quality time in my life and this will help me do everything I want to do before I run OUT of time. I’m getting tired just thinking about it.

We are the ones who decide we want to create more balance and harmony in our lives.  And we want to be able to prioritize what’s important to us and what has value.

Now, what would some of those things be that we value most?

Relationships, family and friends, our spirituality, taking time for leisure, etc.
All good, right?!

Let me share a little experience I had and you tell me what you think.

My husband and I were at a restaurant and I looked over at this table as I was leaving and what I saw so impacted me that I thought it would be perfect to share.

Here was this couple with 2 boys who were sitting there.  I noticed these 2 people who were so engrossed and engaged in texting on their Blackberries so intensely that they were totally ignoring each other AND the boys.  These 2 boys who were just sitting there, were looking around not even talking to each other like they didn’t even know what to do.  Now I don’t know what took place before or after I left, to be fair. They could have been very involved with these kids after I left.  But I kinda don’t think so based on their body language and how intent they were in their own world.

That being said, what I would like to share about how I see time management and the promise that it will somehow magically create peace and harmony and more quality time to spend on the things that I care most about is, false again, sorry….

Why?   Well, I’ll tell you,  just  investing time in something,  really doesn’t mean a whole lot if we are not really there in that present moment.  Just because we show up somewhere and we may have a million things going on in our head does that mean we are really there?!

Or, are we focusing on the next meeting, the next appt. etc., as we show up for dinner or some get-together or one of the kids’ games and then think we are going to get the credit for just showing up and get some ROI (return on our investment) for it. Not so fast.

Think about this if you will; we may be there but if we are tired or pre-occupied, distracted what does that mean? Are we really there?  Are we really present?I

I have a saying in my life and in the work that I do. Be here and nowhere else.

As a coach, one of the things that I want to do is: yes, help someone accomplish more goals and help them with their relationships.  But even more than that, I want to help get them to the place where these things work much better.  By getting to the story that may be stopping someone from reaching a deeper level in what it is that they feel is important to them, whatever that may be.

Discovering that.  NOW that’s an interesting conversation; one I love having.  We all have a story about why we didn’t show up on time or weren’t focused or missed an important event all together.

The dog ate my homework.  My ride was late. I missed getting my assignment done with excellence because I ran out of time. Someone else is at fault and so on and so on.

What does this subject bring up for you?

What are you thinking and has this triggered some thoughts about how you will show up the next time?!  Great news there is always a next time!!

Keep on the journey and give me your feedback on what I’ve shared today.

Some of the concepts of this material comes from the  book; “The Power of Story” by Jim Loehr.

 

Much Aloha,

Coach Kathleen

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The story we tell ourselves.  What does that mean? How does the story we tell ourselves affect the way we look at life?                                                                                                

We all have a viewpoint that is based on our lives up to the present time; where we’ve lived, the people we’ve known and history we’ve created over that lifetime.  Each of us has “a story” and each of us sees that story differently.  For most people their “story” is simply memories of times past; good, bad or indifferent, and they don’t think much about it.

But what if we could change the way we look at “our story?”

If we could uncover how these stories affect us, then we could better use them to our advantage. This is how I feel and how I coach my clients using  some of the questions below.  I pose these questions to help them, not so much understand their  story, but to shift their thinking, to looking at the story and the circumstances differently.

 This, therefore, helps them to understand the power their story has on their lives.

Think about how powerfully your story has a hold of you and affects the way you view your life.  What if by asking yourself some of these questions, you were able to gain some altitude in how you view life?!

 *How is your story working for you these days?

*Is it stopping you from a greater experience in life?

*What about the contribution that is who you are?  What does that mean….. Think about it…..Who we are is actually a contribution to everyone we know and the world around us.

*Is it possible that the way you are, may be having an impact and contribution on those around you and you not even know it? (Later I will go into how I view the word contribution and how we can see the power of that word.)

*Would it be valuable to know what and how your story is impacting your life and others? 

*Would you like to know how it affects your relationships, your friendships, your work and career….

Stay tuned…..

 AND I would like some feedback in how this subject is landing for you.

 

Much Aloha,

Coach Kathleen

 

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MANIFESTING GOALS 101

Jan 18 · by admin

“It is within our minds that brilliance is formed and born.”  Kathleen Reece.

 

Wow, what a concept!  When I thought of this it literally blew me away!  But this is the potential of every one of us.  Each of us has the potential to envision and manifest our goals into reality.

 

How does that happen?  I really don’t know for sure, but I do know that if we are not open to new and different ways of thinking we tremendously limit our possibilities.  I’d like to offer some suggestions for Goal Setting and how this plays into whether we achieve success or are simply driven by circumstances that come our way.  If we allow circumstances to be the determining factor as to whether or not we succeed, then we can’t blame anyone but ourselves when things don’t work out for us.  The power of our own thoughts has a great deal to do with whether we move forward or stay where we are.

 

 Here are some suggestions for your own goal list.  Try them on for size and let me know what you think.  I hope that creating this list will help, encourage, excite and get you moving in a positive direction for the New Year;

 

  • Figure out exactly what you want. Be specific.  The more specific you are the clearer you’ll become about what it is that you are going to accomplish.

 

  • Come up with ONE BIG GOAL. That means reach for the stars! Why not, what have you got to lose?

 

  • Each day write it down several times ( do it as many as 10 times), each time imagining how great it will FEEL to get that big account, to land that new job, to buy that new house etc.

 

  • Go back and read the BIG GOAL OUT LOUD (this ‘locks’ it in place).

 

  • Spend several minutes with your eyes closed imagining your BIGGEST GOAL in all its detail and glory!

 

  • Write down one BIG action step you’ll take that day to make this happen.

 

  • Notice the synchronistic events, or coincidences you experience during the day that seem like a sign from God, as it relates to your BIG GOAL.

 

  • Each day, spend a couple of minutes writing down how very fortunate you are, what you are grateful for, and what you would like to attract more of into your life.

 

  • While you are at it write a letter to whatever you call your Higher Power. (I call mine Almighty God) and go into greater detail about what you want, asking for it to be done by a certain date.

 

Have faith in the process. Don’t cancel out all your manifesting with negative comments or thoughts such as “Why am I doing this anyway, or it won’t happen, it never does.” If you start thinking that way, stop yourself right away and go back to focusing on the BIG GOAL, and how it will feel to achieve it. Faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen. Hebrews 11:1. Faith in the process is 80%.  Putting that faith into action is the other 20%.  Trust your faith and then act on it.

 

Even if you do only ONE of these things, consistently, you’ll start noticing opportunities coming out of the woodwork, and coincidences pointing you in the right direction. Take action on these, they are divinely sent!

 

Aloha for now,

Coach Kathleen

 

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Engagement is a time filled with all the excitement and planning for the wedding and if a couple is wanting to lay a strong foundation for their marriage, it is also important to see this as a time of preparation for that as well.  My goal is to help you do just that.   

Through my coaching and workbook  you will begin to get a better view of what it will take to have a successful marriage and begin to gain the knowledge and tools to equip you on your journey together in one accord. 

 

  

Sessions that we cover over the 7 weeks will be: 

 

Session One:  Introduction

This opens with an interview where we will discuss what we will be covering.   This can be be directed in any way that will serve you.  Weekly or biweekly meeting are available but I suggest meeting every other week to give you some time to go through your assignments and come prepared to ask questions. 

I assign you a personal questionnaire that includes both your personal history and your history with your partner.  If you are interested you can also complete a DISC or a PIAV (these are optional).  DISC is a behavioral profile and PIAV stands for, Personal Interests Attitudes and Values.  Both of these are helpful and it’s kind of fun to see the results.   

Additionally, it might help you later on in life to refer back to:

“in the middle of missed miscommunication”

as a valuable tool to understand your mate better.

 

Session Two:  Debrief and Discuss Family History

We’ll go over the questionnaire and discuss experiences and family history and also look into how family affects the way we view life.

 

Session Three:  Expectations

We will be evaluating your relationship and look at how expectations play a role in our relationships. 

 

Session Four:  Authentic Communication

We will learn about the decision making process, building oneness through authentic communication and learning communication skills and practices that enhance your relationship; such as how to resolve conflict and simple communication tips that stand the test of time. 

 

Session Five:  Roles and Responsibilities

We will learn about roles and responsibilities as we move beyond cultural stereotypes such as the traditional versus modern view and your view on how that plays into a marriage.  This will also cover your religious beliefs and expectations concerning children and how they’re to be raised.  This will include discussing the choice to have children or not. 

 

Session Six:   Money and Finance

We’ll cover how you both view money and the issues that arise around this subject in marriage.  One of the number one problem issues in marriages is usually over money and finance.

 

Session Seven:  Sex and Intimacy

We’ll cover sex and intimacy:   another big issue in marriage.  We’ll be discussing how to understand your spouses needs and expectations that surround these issues.

 

Most couples today will spend thousands of dollars on an elaborate wedding and forget that the most important thing in preparing for that wonderful day is you.  You are the most important thing.  Long after the wedding day and all that it took to get there, what remains will be you and your partner and your life together.  Investing in your future and the legacy that you will leave will be one of the most lasting wedding gifts that you can give each other.

One of the most important aspects in premarital coaching is the commitment to finish the seven weeks course.  I can’t emphasize enough how important this is.    It can be a really fun time.  A time of discovery, challenge, risk, openness, trust and intimacy all the things upon which a marriage is built. 

 

So there you have it!

My “Sneak Preview” of what’s in store for you if you are interested in checking out this program  so you could be  really grounded and have a well rounded view of what marriage is really all about.

So tell me what you think so far? Does this sound like something you’d like to invest in with your fiancé? I mean think about it! This is the biggest step you’ll ever take!!

 

Let me know your thoughts on this post below, I’d love to have your feedback.  And if you want more information you can contact me @ 808.282.9260

I do a complimentary coaching session so you can test drive my style and see if I’d be a good fit for you


Author, Kathleen Reece, (CPBA, CPVA) is known as the “Relationship Coach” by couples around the world. Founder of Relationship Coach for You™ where she helps couples in groups, teleclasses and private sessions. As a professionally certified behavior analyst, she gives couples the communication tools and proven strategies they need to create close and intimate relationships.


The © Copyright to all audio, video, images, and text is held by Relationship Coach for You™ and licensed under a Creative Commons License.

 

 

 

 

 

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On an average most  engaged couples only  receive  a couple of premarital coaching or counseling sessions today before they get married. It is my feeling that is just not enough. Why do I say this? Well let’s look at some statistics.

Out of 3000 couples polled in a survey by Marriage Partnership Magazine, when asked “Did your premarital counseling help your marriage?” This is the breakdown from those who answered yes.

One counseling session received                         15 %
Two sessions received                                            31 %
Three sessions received                                         53 %
And Seven or more sessions received                 75 %

This speaks volumes to me, more than ever, about the importance of investing in your marriage with premarital coaching.

Let me give you a little bit of my story. I was raised Catholic and “back in the day” couples usually met with the priest and had one or two sessions with him. Now I know today the Catholic Church has an engagement encounter which I think is great but back in my day that wasn’t an option.  So, my fiance and I go to meet with this Irish priest for our first session and I can tell you that even today his words still resonate with both my husband and myself and we remember them very clearly.  The one thing he said that stuck out for us was always put your mate on a pedestal! Now I have to say at the very young age that we did marry I don’t think I had a clue what that meant nor would I for years.  But I have to say it stuck in our heads.

That being said, what I want to say is no matter how much premarital coaching or counseling you get, if you decide that it has value it will stick with you your whole life.  That is why I think it is so important to invest in your future with at least 6 sessions to get a really good idea and grip on what the future will hold for you and your fiancé.

After all, isn’t this the biggest step you are about to take in your life? And wouldn’t it behoove you to really see what you are getting into? Seriously!

Like I said before in an earlier blog post, “Before you say I do” couples get caught up in the wedding plans and all the excitement, not to mention the expenses and stress of the whole event. They forget to actually spend some time and energy preparing their hearts for the most important decision they will ever make.

That is why I have created and am so passionate about my Seven Week Premarital Coaching workshop.   I am committed to making a lasting contribution and hopefully a huge difference in the lives of the couples I coach.

So Stay Tuned…..

If you have any thoughts on what I’ve hared thus far, leave a post below and give me your feedback.  I look forward to hearing your thoughts!

 

Author, Kathleen Reece, (CPBA, CPVA) is known as the “Relationship Coach” by couples around the world. Founder of Relationship Coach for You™ where she helps couples in groups, teleclasses and private sessions. As a professionally certified behavior analyst, she gives couples the communication tools and proven strategies they need to create close and intimate relationships. 


The © Copyright to all audio, video, images, and text is held by Relationship Coach for You™ and licensed under a Creative Commons License.

 

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