Before you say I do

June is a perfect time to bring up one of my biggest passions in life!

Since I am a Relationship and Communication Coach, it’s only logical that I place tremendous importance on being prepared before you enter into what I believe to be the most important journey you will ever take in your life.

I believe that today’s couples are ill prepared for what lies ahead in marriage. Often times, couples have even been living together and think they know one another, yet when it comes to tying the knot there is plenty they don’t know.

I think couples go into marriage with a ton of preconceived ideas, thinking that, “when we get married” any little or big concern (spoken or unspoken) will somehow magically take care of itself.

Well let me tell you, that is probably one of the first things I would want to talk to you about.

So let me ask you…What are your expectations about marriage?

I have a ton of questions actually that I would want to ask, and over the next few weeks I hope I will help you discover some of the ways that you could better prepare for the most important decision that you will ever make in your life.

To me marriage is a mystery. You bring two very different people together from two very different backgrounds and sometimes cultures and they commit to love, honor and cherish one another till death do us part.

But is that the way couples look at it today? One of the things that I see couples are missing today, is the willingness to do the hard work first, before they get married. Often times they choose to focus on the plans of the actual wedding day, spending tons of money, time and energy on making sure that every detail is perfect for that day. Forgetting that they are embarking on life’s most important journey together and they may be missing some very key understandings of what lies ahead.

Not that I’ve got all the answers here mind you, but I think I have some solid foundational tools that may really help support you in your commitment to this most important union.

So let’s start at the beginning….

Remember that old saying “LOVE IS BLIND”?!

Well, you may be aware of some negative characteristics in your partner, but you figure, “hey it won’t be like this after we’re married.”

Face it, we are idealistic,

We think, we’re different,

Our marriage will be perfect,

Right?!

Often times you are unaware of the potential problems, arguments and disagreements that so commonly occur in marriage.

So I’d like to help you create a strong foundation, to begin your new life together. My goal is to help you to replace your idealistic view of marriage with a more realistic and healthier view.

Having a more realistic view will help you to move forward together over life’s sometimes bumpy spots that will often happen in every journey. The road is not always smooth but the good news is “there IS joy in the journey!

Would you like to know more about how you can begin your journey together better prepared?

Was this interesting and possibly thought provoking? Did you gain some value or perk your interest?

I hope so. Let me know what you think about what I shared with you today. Looking forward to hearing from you.

Your Relationship Coach,
Kathleen

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Author, Kathleen Reece, Relationship Coach
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Connection is at the Core of Who We are and Communication is the Key

As we begin this new year, I thought Communication would be a good place to spend some time looking at how often our conversations may end up not being what we thought they would be. This will all start make sense, read on;

First off let me say that I love people! But not that I just love people, I find that we are all so amazingly fascinating!!
Every one of us is unique in every way; no two people are the alike.
I’m married to an identical twin. Yes it’s been fun and yes I have many stories, but what is so interesting is that even though they are identical as twins can be, yet they are very different in every way! Uniquely!!

I love to watch people. I’m so curious about their stories, what makes them who they are. That is part of what got me into the field of coaching and specifically communication and relationship coaching. Because people are sooo fascinating!!

I’d like to talk about what makes communication so interesting and maybe you can apply some of what you are reading here to the important relationships in your life.

First let me offer you a few questions to consider;

• Do you want to be a better communicator or to have more meaningful conversations? Or get a chance to see how well you do or do not communicate?

• How about wanting to be a better listener and in turn may be listened to as well.

• Would it be valuable for you to know how good of a listener you really are?

• Is what you are communicating actually being heard the way you are communicating it. Or are you surprised when the other person gets upset or is really unclear on what you just said? And you thought you were so clear!

All these questions have some very simple solutions and as we go along in this series we will be looking at each of these and getting a chance to gain some clarity and tools along the way.

I’ll leave you with this to think about until next time. It should really get you thinking about how this may be so in your life.

Have you ever considered what happens when we meet each other for the first time? How that when we do meet someone for the first time we bringing along with us our history and our cultural history as well, into every conversation we have, into every thought that crosses our mind.

Now that should intrigue you for a moment. I’d like you to sit in that question for a little while and think how that might actually be so, and that you may never ever have thought about how that might color how you see things. It’s a fascinating thing to think about, don’t you think?

Over the next few weeks we will be talking about how your history influences your conversations and how it may at times get in the way of how well you are communicating or listening to someone.

Wouldn’t it be helpful to see how that may actually be effecting how you see things and others see you?

If what I have offered you today has sparked some curiosity, then I would love to hear what you have to say about it. Please feel free to drop me a line and let me know if this was helpful.
Your Relationship Coach
Kathleen


Author, Kathleen Reece, (CPBA, CPVA) known as the “Relationship Coach” by couples around the world. As a professionally certified behavior analyst, she gives couples the communication tools and proven strategies they need to create close and intimate relationships.


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